I've only been back in IMU for a mere 25days and already we've celebrated a few birthdays, fallen asleep in the new lecture hall, run a marathon, take silly pictures in the girls toilet (hold your imagination there, it was... totally normal) finished IMU cup, shop for things i dont really need but really want, AND sat for an endo paper.
Things are really moving fast around here. I have about a year left here in IMU Bukit Jalil *emo*
I dont know what came over me today but i had the sudden spontaeously scary urge to buy stuff. I dont usually spend money on anything unless i've thought and sighed and think somemore about it. But I bought shoes, bed sheets and a pseudo-book. Actuallt cos i spent so much money on the shoes and sheets i couldnt afford the book i wanted anymore so i settled for a cheaper one, it aint the same, but at least it fills the empty void while waiting for repro to start.
You know what would be a weird name for your kid?
John Perrybingle.
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
So cliche i could have been dreaming
Today as I was walking pass the swimming pool, I saw this well groomed gentleman sitting by the bench. He was smiling at me and waving, at first I was a little freaked out la cos I’ve never seen such a friendly stranger before. I thought of making a run for it before he decided to change form and transform into a psyco-ah-beng, but my conscious was working full time that afternoon and reminded me to be at least civil to someone who was already making so much effort to be pleasant. So I smiled and did a small wave. At that second I caught the waft of a very strong sweet smelling perfume, followed by a flash of color as a young woman in impossibly high silver heels floated past me in her flowing floral skirt right into my psyco-ah-beng’s arms. I actually jolted with surprise. Looking at our impromptu Korean drama love triangle by the vista pool, I would have jumped into the water and disappear if I could only swim and if I didn’t have lectures in about 2minutes time.
Sometimes my life really looks like it was cut out from some comedy flick or lame advertisement.
Moral of the story : Don’t be so perasan, make sure people are actually looking at your beautiful imu dress coded body before waving back and learn how to swim.
But I realize sometimes humor like this, even when YOU are the object of humor can teach you a thing or two about yourself. Remind you not to take yourself too seriously =P
And if that was God winking at me to get a sense of humor, I definitely got the much needed hint. Am I wrong to think that the God who created beings as confusing as 20 year old female homosapiens to be one of great humor?
Haha anyways thanks, really.
Wah but still doesn’t change the fact that it was super memalukan lah, still cant get over it.
isssssssh.
My ego is bruised. For life. =P
Sometimes my life really looks like it was cut out from some comedy flick or lame advertisement.
Moral of the story : Don’t be so perasan, make sure people are actually looking at your beautiful imu dress coded body before waving back and learn how to swim.
But I realize sometimes humor like this, even when YOU are the object of humor can teach you a thing or two about yourself. Remind you not to take yourself too seriously =P
And if that was God winking at me to get a sense of humor, I definitely got the much needed hint. Am I wrong to think that the God who created beings as confusing as 20 year old female homosapiens to be one of great humor?
Haha anyways thanks, really.
Wah but still doesn’t change the fact that it was super memalukan lah, still cant get over it.
isssssssh.
My ego is bruised. For life. =P
Saturday, September 08, 2007
7km = 7000m = 700000cm = 7000000mm
We ran... ok well maybe not run...
We jogged... hmm not entirely true either...
We walked...
for the
IMU CHARITY RUN!
7km wei friend, to some it might seem like no sweat.
But i dont even know how far 7km is!
(See my title, makes 7km seem far right? yes!)
So yea, it was a big deal for me that we managed to finish it within the time limit of 1.5 hours.
I confess that this morning when i saw all the people gathering outside IMU, i was a lil worried. I has the impression that this was a fun leisurely thingy just go and lepak while bersenam abit, BUT some of those people looked professional wei!
They got special singlets, and some came from track teams, some had "pacesetters" written on their shirts i mean you hear the word "pacesetters'' also you can roughly figure out what their pace is like rite? fast la of course. One lady cut pass me during the run and wow! her legs were all lean mucle, can see wan leh! *looks down at own short stumpy legs*
It was a fun day, with goodie bags, essence of chicken (1st like drinking it cold *brRr*), carnival food, games, haunted house (which i appretiated from the outside), henna... oh, and more food!
So far, no injuries have been reported, except for Pei's cut on her heel from her new stylo-milo shoes. I still cant believe she ran the whole thing with her GUCCI sunglasses, talk about running in style *weet weet* =p
And suprisingly none of my muscles seem to be singing in pain yet.
Maybe if you tune in tmr, you will catch their debut performance.
Nites world.
30% there and worrying.
The future suddenly seems so scary.
I've always been one to ignore things untill the very last minute, and only look at the problem when it is right in my face. Not really a trait I pride myself in. And this, I have been ignoring for a very long time: My future.
Sit down with any medical student and probably the first question you would want to ask them is:
"So, what do you plan of speciallizing in?"
Usually you the question would be adressed with a mouthfull of big-unpronouncable-titles and a satisfied grin. I just give a nervous smile and a "I'm not really decided at the moment."
Call me naive but when I first enrolled for this course, i painted a really simple picture for myself. It had me looking smart and tidy (maybe with some imagination, a little taller? haha), clicking my shoes as I stride down a brightly lit hospital corridoor, with a clipboard at hand. I am smiling, and despite the permanent eye bags I've earned for myself, I am confident. As I leaf through the list for the day, I am greeted by familiar colleagues I've grown to love and embrace as family, looking up from my clipbpoard I meet the eyes of those who got me through the endless nights on call. I walk into one of the wards and see 'them', many worried, some anxious, some tired and some hopefull. This is not my job I tell myself every morning when I find it hard to drag myself out of bed into the cold shower, "This is my mission".
Well that was what I thought 1.5 years ago anyways.
But then you realise it's not that simple, say I do graduate with an MBBS, would that be enough? Would I want to stop there? If I do find something I'm really passionate about pursuing in detail, would my options be open to me then?
My fear is finally finding something I might love, only to realize in the end that my options have been narrowed down for me, that I'm at a dead end.
People tell me that being a GP these days isnt enough anymore, that in the future, everyone will be holding a postgrad to their name. And it is not hard to see why. I mean, what good is there to know bits and pieces of everything but not understand anything in depth? Jack of all trades and master of none right?
Being an IMU seremban graduate, I am only allowed to specialise in 3 local universities. Note the number 3 is a very small number. (1st uni for the course of choice, 2nd uni for when i'm rejected for the first, and 3rd uni just in case I'm lucky). BUT if i am brave enough to attempt the much talked about USMLE step 1 and step2, my options might be broaden a little bit to the US shores. If i do get a place there for postgrad, for a good course, it would be great! And i think i will be able to more or less support myself with the minimum income they are willing to give as the course is sponsored by the govt. My parents will be able to breathe again! Well, that is the IDEAL situation la, the dilemma now is whether or not i am ready to juggle IMU curriculum AND the USMLE syllabus at the same time. Time is running and i will have to decide soon as everyone knows preparation for USMLE is anything but easy, even if i start today i will still be a little behind.
Plan1: USMLE step1 - before sem6
USMLE step2 - sem 10
*hopefully* gets some interviews in the US
Plan2: USMLE step1 - sem10
USMLE step 2 - after houseman
can wait to see is i get into a local uni, OR interviews in US
Plan3: Stop thinking too much and just concentrate on getting an MBBS FIRST.
But honestly i havent the faintest idea what i want to specialise in, IF i ever do specialise. There are so many probable outcomes from all of this, so much thinking and worrying and wondering and imagining I can do right now, but still in the end i could very well find myself in a totally different situation from whatever I've dreamt up for myself when i reach the other side.
I am only a second year student, metaphorically i can hardly even see the ladder from where i am standing.
Like i said, scary.
I've always been one to ignore things untill the very last minute, and only look at the problem when it is right in my face. Not really a trait I pride myself in. And this, I have been ignoring for a very long time: My future.
Sit down with any medical student and probably the first question you would want to ask them is:
"So, what do you plan of speciallizing in?"
Usually you the question would be adressed with a mouthfull of big-unpronouncable-titles and a satisfied grin. I just give a nervous smile and a "I'm not really decided at the moment."
Call me naive but when I first enrolled for this course, i painted a really simple picture for myself. It had me looking smart and tidy (maybe with some imagination, a little taller? haha), clicking my shoes as I stride down a brightly lit hospital corridoor, with a clipboard at hand. I am smiling, and despite the permanent eye bags I've earned for myself, I am confident. As I leaf through the list for the day, I am greeted by familiar colleagues I've grown to love and embrace as family, looking up from my clipbpoard I meet the eyes of those who got me through the endless nights on call. I walk into one of the wards and see 'them', many worried, some anxious, some tired and some hopefull. This is not my job I tell myself every morning when I find it hard to drag myself out of bed into the cold shower, "This is my mission".
Well that was what I thought 1.5 years ago anyways.
But then you realise it's not that simple, say I do graduate with an MBBS, would that be enough? Would I want to stop there? If I do find something I'm really passionate about pursuing in detail, would my options be open to me then?
My fear is finally finding something I might love, only to realize in the end that my options have been narrowed down for me, that I'm at a dead end.
People tell me that being a GP these days isnt enough anymore, that in the future, everyone will be holding a postgrad to their name. And it is not hard to see why. I mean, what good is there to know bits and pieces of everything but not understand anything in depth? Jack of all trades and master of none right?
Being an IMU seremban graduate, I am only allowed to specialise in 3 local universities. Note the number 3 is a very small number. (1st uni for the course of choice, 2nd uni for when i'm rejected for the first, and 3rd uni just in case I'm lucky). BUT if i am brave enough to attempt the much talked about USMLE step 1 and step2, my options might be broaden a little bit to the US shores. If i do get a place there for postgrad, for a good course, it would be great! And i think i will be able to more or less support myself with the minimum income they are willing to give as the course is sponsored by the govt. My parents will be able to breathe again! Well, that is the IDEAL situation la, the dilemma now is whether or not i am ready to juggle IMU curriculum AND the USMLE syllabus at the same time. Time is running and i will have to decide soon as everyone knows preparation for USMLE is anything but easy, even if i start today i will still be a little behind.
Plan1: USMLE step1 - before sem6
USMLE step2 - sem 10
*hopefully* gets some interviews in the US
Plan2: USMLE step1 - sem10
USMLE step 2 - after houseman
can wait to see is i get into a local uni, OR interviews in US
Plan3: Stop thinking too much and just concentrate on getting an MBBS FIRST.
But honestly i havent the faintest idea what i want to specialise in, IF i ever do specialise. There are so many probable outcomes from all of this, so much thinking and worrying and wondering and imagining I can do right now, but still in the end i could very well find myself in a totally different situation from whatever I've dreamt up for myself when i reach the other side.
I am only a second year student, metaphorically i can hardly even see the ladder from where i am standing.
Like i said, scary.
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