Road Signs

It is pretty lousy timing to choose the beginning of a new posting to blog, but we had such an interesting youth meeting this saturday i had to write it all down before i forgot once again.

We talked about reading the "Road Signs".

I hardly pay attention to road signs unless I'm in a new place or I'm lost. Thus when I'm in good old Subang, you wont catch me staring and pondering over the arrows and red bars. But I'm no longer in good old Subang am I? And maybe it was a good thing too, taking me out of Subang, out of my comfort zone. It is only when you are plucked out of your old life and put at the cross roads leading to whole new other that you bother noticing all these road signs. Scary, confusing, mind boggling at first when these brightly coloured boards stare down at you whispering "Decide.... decide.... decide!", you could do 1 of 2 things. You could decide that life isn't fair, that its too much for you to handle, and you proceed to crawl under the thick comforter waiting for someone to tap you on the shoulder, and just freaking bring you to the end destination. Or you could suck it up, decide to use some brain, some heart and some common sense and give it your best shot.

But if you never bother to read the road signs of your personal life, you might end up with a typical Denise KL trip : Always getting lost, and never going anywhere new.

I surprised myself yesterday when I told the group my current road sign would be the "NO U-TURN" sign. I didn't even know I felt that way until I saw the sign because it looks like such a pessimistic sign. But I'm at a place in my life where i feel there is no U-Turn, I'm more than half way through the course, spent an absurd amount of money, getting older by the minute, in a local private university. LOCAL. PRIVATE. Two words not usually seen together. Local would mean i should have spent less than those who went private, but I did not. Private would mean that my degree gets more recognition overseas, but it does not. Local would mean more chances of me specializing locally, but it does not. Private would mean more chances of me specializing with the private university i graduated from, but it does not. There are allot of other no U-Turn areas in my life, but would be too sensitive to share on the world wide web.

I'm sure there are plenty of nicer, gentler, more nurturing road signs out there that wont give you the shivers when you look at it, like the all inviting "Petrol station 1km ahead" sign, or the Hallelujah "Parking" sign. I was just too fixed, gaping at my "No U-turn" sign that i forgot to look out for my "Petrol station" and "Parking" sign, but i have since learned to look out for them everyday if it is possible because they are going to sustain me from now onwards.

He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them.
Psalms 145:19

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Matthew 11: 28-29

I think the most memorable take home message for me that day was when a friend shared what this sign meant to her:

"This is a 'stop, give way sign' it means to me is that i have to stop myself and give way for God to work"